Wasting Time

Last night I had a category-five headache that kept me up till way too late. I couldn't fall asleep and then somehow I woke up with the same pounding headache; and so the minute I opened my eyes I just wanted the day to be over. I dragged myself around campus all day with that Katrina-kinda headache and then fainted into bed the minute I got back to my room. Sleeping it off was a good idea. After an hour and a half I woke up feeling much better; Katrina tapered off into a light drizzle, though I now feel a bit nauseous from too many hours of brainache.

I'm not doing much but procrastinating now. I have a stupid 10-page government paper due next week which is going to throw me off from my attempts to write my senior "thesis." I've been rather grumpy in the last half-week. The social dynamics in my hall, which were amusing, social, and friendly for most of the year, have been deteriorating into snubbing snobbery, cheap-shots at each other, tension, and our hallmark group dinners fragmenting into games of evasion. And I'm still dead sick of my stupid neighbor whose 19 or 20 year old "fiance" spends every night in our dorm, in her room, and I must hear everything through the wall.

I also, for the life of me, can't bring myself to write. I need to get going on this thesis, and I know it could turn out good. I have all these ideas, but no clue how to put them on paper. And when I try to spew them out of my brain I get too emotional and sappy-hearted to see these words crying at me from the screen. Ugh. Then I think about all the trash that's written in the world. Maybe I would have had an easier time writing trash.