Just You

He told me today that he spent his whole life trying to escape the wealth connection. He was aware of how coming from good money and a good family can make life good. Good things kept coming his way, and he said that he desperately wanted to believe that it was not because he could fill a pool with hundred dollar bills if he wanted. "I'm just me," he said. Despite all the money, "I'm just me."

It was an uninspiring ending to an honest and tender confession. Of course you're just you. Anyone can say "I am me," and it'll still be true, but wait a minute. Was he back-tracking? After all the honesty was he just saying that he is who he is because he is who he is? It sounded kind of circular to me.

"Of course you're just you," I granted. "But anyone could say that. Even someone poor is in part who they are, believe what they do, got to where they are in life, because of the conditions in which they were raised." It applies to everyone: the rich, the poor, and all the shades of privilege and lack thereof in between. You can't just decontextualize a life.

You're just you. But can you really tell me that the reason you got into Harvard has nothing to do with your money? Can you really tell me that the fact that you can trace your ancestry back to five generations of Harvard graduates has nothing to do with it? Can you tell me it has nothing to do with where you were born, and who were your parents, and the life you had and the elite primary and secondary education you could afford?

Or did you get so far in life because you're "just you?"